Love alone, unlike alll the love songs that have ever been written, is never enough to make a marriage work. Here are the signs and characterisitics that could be warning signs of trouble down the road. Character traits like jealousy or trouble with committment seldom change after you get married. Chances are very likely if she's wanting you to change now before you're married; she'll want it even more once you're hitched. Life just works that way. Here's what you need to know to identify the problem areas.
1. She has trouble committing.
This can be shown in past behaviours such as how committed to her job, family and friends she is. Does she have "good" friends that she leaves behind without a care in the world? How many jobs has she held in the past several years and what were the reasons that she left? Knowing how she handled past instances with people that have been important to her will give you a really good indicator whether or not this is someone you should pledge your undying love for at the altar. She just may not have the ability or the desire to commit to someone for the long run or through the good times and bad.
2. She doesn't like your friends.
If she doesn't like you hanging with your friends now, that likely won't change. Unless your friends are convicted felons or out to take advantage of you; then she shouldn't have a problem with the occasional boys night out or even including them in your social occasions. To make a marriage work, there needs to be trust and respect. You must find a healthy balance of give and take. Of course if you're hanging with your buds every night of the week, you're guaranteed to have a "discussion" or two about spending time with her. Aside from that, it's healthy to have common interests with your future mate but there must be room (and trust) to enjoy interests that your mate doesn't share. It will give her the chance to enjoy the same freedoms within your relationship.
3. Her sex drive is very different than yours.
Differing views and needs in the bedroom can take an exhausting and emotional toll on a relationship. If her sex drive is much higher than yours or much lower, it can cause big problems. Whether or not it's a medical or emotional cause that's causing the difference needs to be taken into consideration. Many medications or medical conditions may cause a lessening or change in the libido and could well be a temporary condition. Walking down the aisle is unlikely to change any pre-existing differences in the bedroom and could very easily make them worse. Many marriages fail because the expectations of sex differ and the ability to enjoy each other on an intimate level is different for each person. Finding that person who matches your needs in the bedroom is key to the longevity of your marriage.
4. She has a jealous streak.
If you're not giving her a reason to be jealous, there's absolutely no reason that female friends should make your girlfriend jealous. A marriage vow and a ring on the finger will not change if you're having repeated arguments about any female that you socialize or work with. If her jealous streak is about a mile wide and you're frustrated with it already; a walk down the aisle will only make it a permanent condition that you have to live with. Openly flirting with females can cause a lot of problems; it's important to keep this in check and realize that you might be part of her problem with the "green eyed monster". Generally, if jealousy is rampant with your woman, she'll be possessive and irrational even if you're completely innocent. It will be the kiss of death for your relationship and the fact that you've done the "I do's" won't do anything to save you the misery.
5. She's continually trying to change you.
We can all change or improve things in life, but we want to do so at our own pace and not because we feel like we're not good enough. If your gal is continually nit-picking at various things like how you dress or your job, or your interests and it leaves you with an empty feeling, then she's definitely not marriage material. We rely on our partners to give us advice and reasonable suggestions; but when it becomes a case of you feeling like she's out to change everything about you, then it's time to dig your heels in about picking a wedding date. Her desire to change you will only take on more importance once you put the ring on her finger. Ask yourself whether her ideas are logical or in your best interests and if they aren't, no amount of wedded bliss will help your overcome your feelings of being pushed around.
Of course there's no guarantee in any marriage; however if you spot some of these traits in your girlfriend it's time to put the brakes on the whole, misguided idea of wedded bliss with her. Marriage is a joining of two people, sharing all facets of their life together. Some good and some bad. If you feel your gal doesn't have what it takes for the long haul now; it's a fairly safe bet that in the future you will be able to pawn your wedding ring to pay for the divorce lawyer down the road. Keeping these five warning signs in mind when you are dating will help keep you from marrying the wrong woman and go a long ways to helping you share a strong and healthy marriage with that woman who is ideal for you.